coming to you from the nj

Yes, I am in the land of my adolescence. Writing from my mother's retirement community where all the pastel, manicured, two bedroom, one-floor houses look exactly the same and everyone drives nose to windshield at a break neck 25 MPH.

It's my mom's birthday so I came down to celebrate with her. I've been here since last night and am READY to return home. Today, I treated her to a mani/pedi and dinner at a nice Italian restuarant where the busboy kept calling me Ma'am.

We also went shopping because there's really not anything else to do here and I managed to get some cool shoes and some clothes at great prices, with no sales tax. GO JESRSEY! I also found a couch and chair I may purchase, I'm thinking it over and leaning toward yes.

Tomorrow, I begin meeting with my new writing group, comprised of two writers whose work I've long admired, so I'm pretty excited about that. We're all working on full-length books and I'm hoping meeting with them on a regular basis will prompt me to finish the damn thing. I'll keep ya posted.

flickr

I now have a flickr account so watch out.

not domesticated

I have a headache which I've chosen to ignore since I promised myself I wouldn't get sick anymore. This Wednesday has been good to me. A light workload at the day job made it possible to get some much-needed catching up done. Tonight, I want to go to the gym and make some food. I've been eating the same pizza since Saturday. I'm not very domesticated so this happens often. If not pizza, then PB&J on toast or grilled cheese, sometimes cereal. I need to start cooking something soon.

resolutions check...

Okay kids, we’ve got a lot to cover.

Yesterday, I spent most of the day at what I’ve come to call THE YUPPIE CAFÉ in Park Slope although most of the people there are not Yuppies at least not in the traditional Alex P. Keaton sense. Everyone is either a young mom nursing a baby, a Dansko-wearing Yoga-Mat carrying post-hippie or an aging hipster tapping away on the laptop (I am in this last category). So I just put on my headphones and went to work.

I think I’ve talked about this before, but I have a bit of the writer’s ADD. So, I worked on two stories simultaneously – and at some point I realized both are about exes. It’s like good ex, bad ex. Anyway, afterwards met up with the good ex for our Target date. I’ve been avoiding the Target on Atlantic Ave. for months now despite the bargains contained therein and now I know why; it’s like a suburban shopping mall but somehow even more annoying and fluorescent. W. bought some pet supplies. I bought a cat toy and some mint bubble bath packaged to look like Kiehl’s and we got the hell out of there. We rode the R as far as my stop and parted ways.

But I had further plans for the evening. So I went home, changed clothes and headed over to GirlyNyc's to watch the season premiere of THE L WORD, which was great on many levels but we all found ourselves wanting more hot lesbo sex on screen. At some point someone shouted "Somebody fuck somebody." Despite this, we all enjoyed ourselves and I was relieved to see Shane's hair is more wonderfully disastrous than ever. I have to say she may be the hottest character on the show this season. Last year I thought it was Marina, but apparently she tried to commit suicide and is convalescing in Italy. I hope she comes back.

After the screening, Girly, Nichelle and me headed over to a party on Ave. C where we donned "wife-beater" t-shirts which would be decorated with sharpies by our fellow partiers. Mine was adorned with a beautiful dragon encroaching upon my left breast, on the back someone else drew that ever elusive creature - "The Liger." There was so much funny smoke in the air, I think I got a little high off the fumes. I drank a lot of cranberry juice and talked to a bunch of cool people. There were a lot of top hats in the crowd. At some point a copy of Naughty Spanking Stories from A to Z got passed around. I started talking to this guy about the book and recommended he read my three favorite stories. I must have recommended them in a stern voice because he said something like, "what will you do if I don't read them?" "Oh, you'll see," I said then walked away, where I kept an eye on him to make sure he kept reading. When he was done he came up to me asking for more assignments. There was a brief encounter involving a wooden spoon.

Anyway to make a long story short, I was out until 3:30 a.m. and took a cab home in the lovely snow. I didn't leave alone. I was up until 6:30 a.m.

I thought it was an appropriate time in 2005 to revisit my New Year’s Resolutions and check on how I’m doing.

These were some my original resolutions:

3. Freelance writing

UPDATE: Will be sending a bunch of queries out this week, could have done more up to this point, but I’m on the case now.


7. Join Real Gym

UPDATE: Been going at a steady pace. Stopped going to Pilates at the fancy Pilates school since they offer the class at my new muscle man gym. Been lifting a lot of weights also, which has been doing wonders for my rack.


8. Learn how to say no

UPDATE: I said no to a few things last week. These were all things I would have liked to do and be a part of but doing them would have kept me from working on my own stuff or would have inconvenienced me in some way so I just said no. It felt good. In the past I would have gone out of my way to do everything, then felt frazzled and bitter and I just can’t do that anymore. Also, back in January, I said no to something I really DID NOT WANT TO DO and that felt totally awesome

10. It Would Be Nice to Have Sex Again

UPDATE: BREAKING NEWS, THIS JUST IN – SEE ABOVE.

freakin' cold

Yes,it's freezing here in NYC. I had a date with my ex to go to Target this afternoon but we both cancelled thinking instead we'd hang out tonight at one or another's apartments with a pizza and a DVD. But neither of us feels like going out in the cold tonight so we're shooting for Target again tomorrow afternoon.

My ex and I get along very well. This is new for me. I do exchange e-mails with another ex from time to time and yet another one lists my events on their website but that's about it. W. and I have been broken up for almost a year now and still like seeing each other. I don't know if this is a sign of maturity or resignation but we continue to enjoy each other's company. She's a journalist. Her latest works: Lesbian Drama Thrives on Showtime and this one for EVOTE.

juice, juice baby

Here is a list of the illnesses I've had since late December:

* Cold/Flu
* Urinary Tract/Bladder Infection
* Unspecified Stomach Issues
* Extreme PMS
* Sinus Headaches

Suffice to say, I am making strides to stop being sick. I'm pretty healthy; don't smoke, drink, eat meat or processed foods. I gym 3-4 times a week. There's not much left to cut out.

Oh well. I am contemplating another juice fast - I haven't done one in a while but the last time I felt super healthy afterwards. Only problem: I really don't like juice...

more wysiwyg goodness...

Check out RKB'slatest Lusty Lady Voice column on Worst.Sex.Ever. where she mentions my story "The Size of His Ship." She even quotes me! Woo hoo. I feel important.

Thanks again to the great producers of WYSIWYG - Chris, Andy and Dan, I'm still feeling the good vibrations!

Also, check out the other readers. They all have fabulous blogs:

Chelsea Peretti
Bob Powers
Blaise K.
Matt Kovach
Bad Man
Chris hampton
Fautus, M.D.

BEST.READING.EVER.

I really think tonight may have been the best reading I've been a part of in 12 years of doing spoken word. If not THE BEST, then definitely in the top three.

I am too tired right now to go into the fine points of the evening but it all came together so beautifully; excellent readers, awesome producers, a classic performance venue, a universal topic and perhaps most importantly, an incredibly warm, attentive audience.

It was the kind of event that reminds me why I keep doing what I do after all these years.

Okay, off to bed.

bloody valentine

Okay, so last night I pillaged my closet and tried on like 5 or 6 skirt outfits and one dress and narrowed it down to two choices both of which I was going to bring with me to work today. I wanted to wear a skirt tonight to the Worst. Sex. Ever reading so I could show off the totally fierce, glam, platform boots I bought a few weeks ago.

But I woke up late and with the curse in full throttle complete with bloating and cramps so I picked one of my sexier tops which I have coupled with tuxedo pants and less spectacular heels. Ugh, I feel like crap. I'm so sick of feeling sick. This has been one long Winter.

I'm excited for the show tonight, also a bit nervous!! I always get nervous reading new work. I'm gonna try to cut out of the day job early today so I can go over my piece a few times.

wysiwyg in Time Out

Check the clips out here:
WYSIWYG.

This show may sell out, so order your tickets now.

middle of the night

Okay, went to bed around ten, now I'm wide awake at 3:40 a.m. I hate when this happens. I just realized the other day that I've been keeping this blog for six months. I guess this constitutes a blogiversary? I wasn't sure when I began back in August if I was going to keep it going beyond my trip to Edinburgh, but I find it terribly addictive - in a good way. The perfect repository for all the thoughts and partial ideas that will probably never make it into a larger piece of writing or at least not for a while. And after futile attempts at keeping a Live Journal - I think I posted twice - I'm happy to be keeping it up.

better

I'm feeling much better today. Thanks so much to everyone who e-mailed to check on me. It made me feel all warm inside.

I think the craberry juice really zapped whatever tiny organisms were swimming around in there. I have a pretty bad sore throat now, but that's less annoying and easier to deal with.

So, I'm back at work, catching up on the many e-mails I've neglected since Tuesday. I hate when the messages pile up like dirty socks on my bedroom floor (they're there too, will take care of that when I get home).

Mom: The Movie

From Filmmaker Erin Greenwell:

The premise? An uptight market researcher and her fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants cameraperson/aspiring tattoo artist (Julie Goldman) are on the road to their next job. When the two get stranded at a youth hostel in a Podunk town called Little Hope, all hell breaks loose. Add a bored house wife and you've got a sexy lesbian buddy movie.

Come get acquainted with “Mom” at our upcoming script reading on Thursday,February 24th from 7-10pm in NYC. It’s our first official fundraiser and a way for you to get an inside look at how an independent film gets off the ground.The reading is held at the LGBT Center (208 W. 13th St.) and donations of $20+ will save you a seat!

Every bit helps! Your donations promote fiscal autonomy for filmmakers to create
outside of the studio system. As someone who has fundraised before, receiving
many "small" donations can be as thrilling as one large one because they represent the community of support that makes independent film happen.

Please pass this on to anyone who may be interested in making a donation to help support “Mom”. Our goal is to raise $10,000 independently through e-mail/web
donations by March. With your help, we know we can do it! Won’t you show your
love for “Mom?”

Donations can be made via check (tax deductible) or through a secure Pay Pal link (not tax deductible but very convenient) at the "Be a Funder" section of the following website:

Mom The Movie

Thank you for your support and we hope to see you at the reading!

Script Reading/Fundraiser for "Mom": In Our Own Write
Sponsored by Lesbian Cinema Arts and the LGBT Center
February 24, 2005 Thurs. 7pm-10pm
LGBT Center
208 W. 13th St.
New York, NY
$15 Center Members/$20 Non Members


Erin Greenwell
Mom The Movie

cross gender caravan

From Carolyn Connelly:

The Cross Gender Caravan comes to your town!

Young transgender writers tell their stories in fiction,
essays and poetry. And along the way, they expand the
boundaries of both gender and artistic expression. Your
genderscape may never be the same again!

West Coast Dates:
San Francisco, CA
Thursday, April 7th, 7:00 pm
City Lights Bookstore
261 Columbus Avenue
San Francisco, CA 94133
415-362-8193

San Francisco, CA
Friday, April 8th, 7-9 pm
The New College
Tranny Double Dose! With the Tranny Roadshow
Sponsored by the New College
766 Valencia St. (b/wn 18th and 19th) at the SF Cultural Center


San Francisco, CA
Saturday, April 9th
Writers with Drinks Reading Series

San Francisco, CA
Sunday, April 10, 6:30 pm
Mills College

Berkeley, CA
Monday, April 11th, 7:30 pm
Cody¹s Bookstore
2424 Telegraph Avenue
Berkeley, CA 94704
(510) 845-7852


Portland, OR
Wednesday, April 13th, 7:30 pm
Powell¹s Books
1005 W Burnside
Portland, OR 97209

Seattle, WA
Friday, April 15, 7:00 pm
Confounded Books
315 E Pine St
Seattle Wa 98122
206 382 3376

Vancouver, BC
Sunday, April 17, 9:00PM
Thundering Word Heard reading series
Cafe Montmartre
4362 Main Street (at 28th)

Featuring:

Tennessee Jones (southern ex-punk with high pompadour whose
first book, Deliver Me From Nowhere, explores the sex and
gender badlands of Middle America through the prism of Bruce
Springsteen's album Nebraska)

Charlie Anders (author of Choir Boy, a bittersweet and surreal
story of a choirboy who takes female hormones to keep his
voice from changing and discovers a world of gender confusion.
Charlie publishes other, the magazine of pop and politics for
the new outcasts.)

Carolyn Connelly (high femme metal head whose zine, A Brooklyn
Diary, includes tales of growin up queer and working class in
Brooklyn, and hanging out with Metallica when they actually
mattered)


Andre Hewitt, aka The Urban Hermit (Get ready for The Urban
Hermitt zine and The Flow Chronicles, a book about nitemare
hippies and coming out as queer in the midst of lsd induced-
heterosexist- rainbow gathering love. Andre writes about
counterculture, with soul.)

from The Art Vibe Writer's Series

I was their October writer you know...

The Art Vibe announces it's February Writer of the Month!!!

We are proud to have the work of Scott Hirschberg

--Excerpted from Scott Hirschberg's short story "Tazo's Last Donut" is now up and ready for your veiwing, enjoy!

weekend in a list or Cupcakes Are The New Cocaine

Okay, here's what happened:

***FRIDAY***

Great night. The Writing Aloud reading was fantastic. It felt good to do a poetry feature again. The audience was warm and welcoming and the venue, the Prince George Tea Room, was really beautiful.

Then we headed off to Regie Cabico's "The Rage of Aquarius" party at St. Mark's Poetry Project where I was surprised to find myself on the bill for that evening's performance. This is in keeping with my recent burst of "I'm Not Old" hard-core living. I haven't double fisted the readings in a long time. The crowd at this particular event looked to be barely legal but Tim and I mangaed to turn it out. Did a bit of dancing and was really impressed with one of the other performers, a young woman by the name of PP Snatch who sang songs about math class and her chihuahua. She said PP stood for Perfectly Perfect.

Then Tim, Avra and I headed over to Veselka where I devoured a giant chocolate cupcake and a cup of peppermint tea. The cupcake was good but not as good as the ones RKBis always toting around from Sugar Sweet Sunshine but it filled my craving for something sweet. Tim and I got back to my house at 2:30 a.m. Punk Rock!

***Saturday***

Woke up feeling what I can only describe as a "coke hangover." Or at least something closely resembling my memories of coke hangovers. Thus proving my suspicion that "Cupcakes Are The New Cocaine" (more on this later but I am deterined to prove this theory).

Anyway, Tim and I lumbered to Porty Authority to pick up Karen G. from Cliterati who had just arrived from Atlanta. After lunch at a Chinese restaurant in Park Slope, we headed back to my house and watched Napoleon Dynamite which was well, dynamite. What a weird little film...

Mr. Wells stayed in that night but Karen and I hit the hip Lower East Side dyke bar Girls Room. GR is nicely decorated, with a good sound system and they had some really hot go-go dancers strutting across the bar. I drank two Red Bulls, Ms. Karen stuck to Gin & Tonics. GR is cleaner and cuter than ye olde Meow Mix (RIP) but the cliquish dyke song remained the same.

After a few subway snafus, including being stuck on a platform for half an hour with a couple making out next to us letting forth disgusting slurping sounds, which I hate, and a guy talking to himself very loudly about sluts, we didn't get home until almost three. Hard core!

***SUNDAY***

Could not properly communicate with my guests until after my first cup of coffee at my local diner. Actually, we were all pretty lame until we got some caffeine and food pumping through our systems. We enjoyed at leisurely brunch then headed to Chinatown for Tim to buy a pink, Dior knock-off purse. Not for him, of course, but for a lucky co-worker.

Then back to Brooklyn for another fantastic Atomic. Turnout was low, thanks to that big football game everyone was talking about, but we managed to have a good time. Afterwards, we had more diner food, and headed over to Ginger's for some Brooklyn-style lady lovin'. Actually, our little group sat in a corner talking about '80's music and movie icons, then played the naked lady photo hunt game. Got home at 2:30 a.m.

***MONDAY***

Woke up sans hangover. Maybe I just need to build up my tolerance for staying out late? Anyway, dropped Ms. Karen off at the Port Authority and am now toiling away at the day job.

Tim will be at Telephone Bar tonight. I'm going but I'll be heading home on the early side...

poetry friday

Have my first poetry feature tonight since August! I have to admit I'm a little nervous, but all should be good. Have my set picked out and it includes a brand new piece and a few older ones. I remember back in the day when I was regular slammer at the Nuyorican, I would spend all of Friday with my stomach in knots awaiting that night's performance. It always turned out fine, sometimes even incredible and people would come up to me and say things like, "you're so natural" and "you make it look so easy." Little did they know I was practically puking from nerves five minutes before the reading. Such is the discreet art of the spoken word.

Then Tim and I are off to St. Marks Poetry Project to hang out with Regie Cabico and Co.

Queer Zine Showdown

Queer Zine Showdown:
a zine release xtravanganza

The Featured Bouts:

Round 1 -- Queens Cutter Sarinya flames out with Wheels of
Fire, tales of bike messengering, emergency rooms, and
gender trouble from the first female Asian firefighter in
New York City.

Round 2 -- Tennessee "Tussler" Jones reads from the latest
Teenage Death Songs, featuring skeleton drum corps, the
fight for true love, evangelical Appalachians, and the best
goddamn soundtrack you can imagine. Fuck all those white
trash bar nights; this is the real thing.

Round 3 -- Brooklyn Bruiser Carolyn Connelly presents Street
Corner Sass, the second edition of Brooklyn Diary, which
includes stories about growin up queer, metal, and working
class in Brooklyn. You wanna hear about hanging
out with Metallica when they actually mattered, dontcha?


Thursday, Feb. 17th at 7pm
Bluestockings Books
172 Allen Street (at Stanton)

the oldest gal in the group

For a long time in my '20's I was the youngest girl in the group. I dated slightly older people and most of the arty poetry types I hung with were at least a few years older than me. Now in my early '30's (eek!) I suddenly find myself the oldest broad in the group. Yes, I used the word Broad, as in the harried been-there-done-that archetype. Girl just doesn't cut it anymore.

Never has this been clearer to me than tonight at the BUST party where I found myself surrounded with sweet young things boogying to "Off The Wall" an album which for me harkens back to a time of roller skates and Sergio Valente jeans. For them, it probably was the soundtrack to which they were conceived. At one point I think I even muttered the chilling phrase, "does the music really have to be this loud?"

It's hard enough being sober at an open bar. It's even harder when you feel like you're an old fart who can't wear her platforms for too long without getting shin splints.

On a better note, after a harrowing, expensive cab ride from Port Authority, Tim and I have been safely delivered to my house. He is currently asleep on the couch and I am about to tear into the latest issue of Diva imported from the U.K. especially for me. Angelina Jolie is on the cover. Sweet Dreams!

attack of the crazy cat lady...

Okay, I'm the first to admit, I talk about my cats more than necessary. But I don't carry around pictures of them and people often ask me what they look like, so Sabrina and Lulu now each have their own pages at Catster. I have to get better pictures of them but until then, enjoy!

Tonight I go to the BUST party then meet up with Tim.